By Sakeena Habib
I used to wonder what happened to mums when they had a child?
Where did they go? In fact, these mums suddenly change in their behaviors, in their identities, in their way of living.
I often wondered what does it even feel like to have a new human being come into your life?
And to now spend every moment of your life with them, be it the most intricate of moments?
Yes, it is tiring, it is exhausting, it is an un-ending duty!
It doesn’t just consume you with their duties, but also makes you lose your identity somewhere.
I am on this journey as well, as I speak.
Being a mother, however, humbles you. I used to think that I have lost myself. I do not know what am I doing, what is my purpose now?
After much contemplation, I realised, ‘’I am reborn, just as my baby was born!”
So, in order to welcome my new self, I need to accept all the new adjustments because this is a new part of me now.
When we buy a new cutlery set, do we not need to adjust it in a new place in the kitchen? Do we not need to get ourselves familiar with its usage? Do we not need to experiment and test it out?
It takes time until we get a hold of it and then it becomes a part of our daily routine.
Similarly, motherhood is a unique journey on its own. Be it a young mum, a going-to-be mum, a mid- aged mum, a working mum or a mum of adults, we all play our roles in the most phenomenal ways and each of us has to carry certain responsibilities for the sake of our children – who are Allah’s utmost precious blessings for us.
I hear those mothers who need to juggle their career, their children, their family, their volunteering services to the community out there as well. I hear you.
And can I just point out the fact that it isn’t just you or me…
Let us go back and look deep into the history of the Ahlul Bayt A.S. and you will find several women who displayed such bravery and enthusiasm as outstanding mothers.
Lady Fatima SA, sieved and grinded wheat with one hand, as she rocked her Hasanains AS with the other hand. Subhanallah on her lips were the praises of Allah SWT!
Lady Zainab SA brought along her two sons Aun & Mohammad to Karbala with the understanding that the reward of the hereafter that awaits is much better than of this world.
Lady Ummul Baneen SA raised sons like no other, especially like Hazrat Abbas AS, who devoted his entire loyalty to Imam Hussain A.S in Karbala.
Lady Umme Farwa SA raised a son such as Hazrat Qasim, who at a tender age of 13, had the understanding (Marefat) of what death feels like, “sweeter then honey”.
Lady Umme Layla did shukr in prostration to Allah SWT after knowing that her young 18 year old Hazrat Ali Akbar was brutally martyred on the plains of Karbala.
Lastly, Lady Umme Rabab SA, promised that she would never sit again in the shadows after she had lost Hazrat Ali Asghar and Sayyeda Sakina SA.
These mothers were no ordinary mothers. They instilled utmost wisdom, patience, courage, love for Allah and the Ahlulbayt in their children and brought them up in the best of manners. Along with all the hardships that all mothers go through, these mothers went through much more than we can even begin to imagine.
Today, let us cherish our motherhood and let us connect deeply with these mothers who to date stand as strong true role models for, true examples who guide us to take lessons of active patience and resilience from.
When you and I feel like we are drowning and losing our strengths, let us remind ourselves of these women. Let us and pull ourselves back up and move on with the right focus of what it really means to be an amazing mother!
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